March 27-28 at 6:30
For auditions, you will be asked to read from the script with other auditioners.
Kronkie, a middle-aged recluse, lives in general disarray in her
tumbledown mansion at the edge of the municipal dump. Opal collects
things-anything that can be toted home in her little red wagon. Opal is
also an optimist, for no matter how mean her lot-or her "friends" – she
responds with unfailing kindness and an abiding faith in the goodness of
human nature. Into her rather strange world come Gloria, Bradford and
Solomon, three purveyors of bogus perfume, on the lam from the
authorities. Opal's home is the perfect hideout-and Opal, herself, might
be the remedy for their shattered finances. They decide that what she
needs is plenty of insurance, a rapid demise, and three beneficiaries
named Gloria, Bradford and Solomon. Attempted murder wouldn't seem to be
funny, but in Mr. Patrick's magic hands it is uproarious. The laughs
ensue as the unsavory trio concocts elaborate schemes to ensure Opal’s
KRONKIE: Age- late 50’s. Opal is bird-like and lives in a house in the
middle of a dump. She is a junk collector who is very amiable and
positive all the time.
**Actress must be able to do some physical humor and “stunts”, i.e. being pulled across the floor, etc.
GLORIA GULOCK: Age- 19-25. Gloria is over-dressed, with too much make-up.
She has a brashness that compensates for her insecurity. She is
hardened for 19. She has feelings for Brad.
Age- 25-30’s. Brad is threadbare but handsome. He is a man of superior
intellect who uses it maliciously. His interest in Gloria is less than
SOLOMON BOZO: Age- late 35-40’s. Sol is the shabby
boss of the trio of crooks. He charms to get what he wants. **Actor
must be able to pull a heavy load.
OFFICER JOE JANKIE: Joe is a young local policeman who is slightly naive.
DOCTOR: An insurance doctor without a sense of humor.